Thursday, 30 October 2014
Adam Baker, Impact (2014)
Sentries manned the wire.
Thrillerland. Zombietown. The Literocalypse has come. No time now prosewise for bells, whistles. Main verbs. Prepositions. Personal pronouns. Fuck that. It's clipped sentences, now. Manly sentences.
A pretentious Literary Novel climbed the chain-link. Pages streaked with purple prose and similes.
'Look at him. Fucking Proust.'
The rotting canonical text had reached the razor wire. Barbs tore its binding.
'Give me some red tip. I want to light this fucker up.'
Standard full-metal jacket rounds swapped for a clip of incendiary cartridges.
'Proust? No zombies in that fuckheap.'
'No last minute flights in an antique B-52. No plan to drop an atom bomb to wipe out the source of the zombie virus. No plane crashing in Death Valley leaving the crew exposed to heat, infighting and the endless zombie threat in that pile of memorious shit.'
'It's all madelaines, madelaines, fucking madelaines. Far as the eye can see.'
Crank the charging handle. Cross-hairs centre on the spine of the book. Complex emotions and nuanced writing. Pitiless like a shark.
Lower the cross-hairs. Centre on his open page.
Gunshot.
Skullburst. Book blown apart. Paper confetti and magnesium fire. Proust's fucking silly writing landed on the grass in pieces.
'Give me a drink.'
'All we got left is Bud.'
Tab-crack. Head thrown back.
'Fucking piss.'
Can crush. Belch.
A fresh survey of the crowd of literary fiction pushing at the fence.
Cross-hairs centre on a James Joyce short story, couldn't be more than 10-pages long. 'We should hose those fuckers in aviation fuel and toss a match. Save some ammo.'
'Fucking connecting particles. Fucking James Wood. Fucking bollocks the lot of it. Main verbs! Nuance! Who needs it? Fuckers.'
Blam!
Wednesday, 29 October 2014
Louis Geoffroy, Napoléon Apocryphe (1841)
Often cited as the author of the world's first alternate history, Geoffroy (1803–1858; a writer whose real name—Louis-Napoléon Geoffroy-Château—rather signals his Bonapartist sympathies) published Napoléon et la conquête du monde in 1836, and revised the book in 1841 as Napoléon Apocryphe. Its jonbar point is Napoleon's successful invasion of Russia in 1812. After this, and in quick order, he takes over England (1814) and then the rest of the world, leading it into a new golden age of technological advance, peace and prosperity. I particularly like the ease with which he conquers the USA. Revolution has so weakened this nation that it has collapsed altogether.
Depuis plus de vingt années, L'Amérique, cette terre sans passé, sans races, sans patries, qui, pour remplacer ses enfants égorgés, avait mendié à L'Europe son trop plein de peuples et à L'Afrique le marché de ses douleurs; cette terre qui, sans avoir eu de jeunesse, était arrivée à la décrépitude au milieu de révolutions innombrables, l’Amérique se dissolvait, et tendait à une ruine complète. [415]What can be done to assist this benighted place? 'Napoléon seul pouvait sauver l’Amérique ... dans tous les cas, il n’y'avait plus de salut pour elle en dehors de la monarchie napoléonienne.' By 1827 the conquest is completed, and 'Universal Monarchy' finally instituted:
La monarchie universelle! Combien ont prononcé ces mots qui ne comprenaient pas l'idée qu’ils renferment. Combien le sont balbutiées et répétées froidement ces paroles: enfants, hommes, pédants et rois, qui ne savaient ce que c’était que la monarchie universelle, pas plus que l'infini et que Dieu, dont à chaque instant leurs bouches murmurent les noms.That's the thing about Fascism. Its roots are much deeper than you realised. Here are the articles of the new Napoleonic world order:
Art. 1. Les continents, les îles et les mers qui couvrent la surface du globe composent la monarchie universelle.Nicely ironic, that article 9. Everyone seems cool about accepting Christianity as the sole global religion, including all the Jews, with one single exception ('Samuel Manassès, rabbin de Strasbourg, protesta avec la plus grande violence contre la décision de ses frères, et, dans un moment d’exaltation, il s’écria: 'a que le Christ signale donc sa vérité et sa puissance! Pour moi, fidèle à la loi de mes pères, je le blasphème hautement, et je défie le dieu des chrétiens!'). But this protest doesn't last long: stubborn Manassas is touched by 'le doigt de Dieu', has a fit, falls to the ground and dies there and then. So much for him! 'Cette circonstance extraordinaire,' Geoffroy adds blandly, 'porta le dernier coup à la religion juive, elle expira cette année avec le culte et les constitutions de Moïse.' French is made the universal language; everybody is happy and at peace. Of course 'l’empereur conserva son immense armée', but you'd hardly expect him to give it up, now, would you. N. draws up a plan to eliminates all other races by selective breeding over seven generations ('arriver à la suite de quelques générations à une unité de race et de couleur') and he makes great strides in science, including the invention of superfast cars ('des voitures qui volaient avec la rapidité de la foudre sur les routes en fer') and a fleet of 'ballons aérostatiques' powered by 'les forces magnétiques avec l'électricité'. There are odder inventions, including pliable soft-glass (seriously: 'le verre, si résistant et si friable, s’amollit sous les doigts de la chimie, il se plia comme une cire assouplie') and actual mathematical impossibilities are accomplished, including squaring the circle:
Art. 2. Le christianisme est la seule religion de la terre.
Art. 3. La monarchie universelle réside en moi et dans ma race à perpétuité.
Art. 4. Le siége de la monarchie universelle est à Paris, capitale de la terre.
Art. 5. La terre est divisée en quatre parties:
L'Europe; L'Asie à laquelle sont réunies les îles de l'Océania; l’Afrique et l'Amérique.
Art. 6. Les quatre parties de la terre sont subdivisées en royaumes.
Art. 7. La France conserve seule le nom d’empire.
Art. 8. La guerre est désormais interdite aux rois et aux peuples.
Art. 9. L’esclavage est détruit.
Art. 10. Les rois de la terre sont, sous notre souveraineté, chargés en ce qui les concerné de l’exécution du présent décret. Donné à Paris, ce 4 juillet 1827. NAPOLEON.
Une merveilleuse inutilité, long-temps crue impossible, la quadrature du cercle, fut découverte dans des circonstances singulièresA new planet is discovered ('la planète de Vulcain'). The book doesn't say so, but maybe Napoleon goes off to conquer that one next.
Here's the SFE3 entry on Geoffroy. Never been translated into English, it seems. I wonder if it's worth my doing so. [update: Ian Watson points out that the same SFE3 entry that claims it's never been Englished also cites a 1994 English version. So that saves me the bother.] [second update: the argus-eyed John Clute spotted this blogpost and with characteristic scrupulousness updated the SFE3 entry within hours of my posting here.]
Sunday, 26 October 2014
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (dir Jonathan Liebesman, 2014)
Driving back from the cinema, I was singing the old TMNT TV theme song, which nowhere appears in this movie. My 6-year old, Dan (and why else would I pay good money to see this fillum at the cinema if not for the exceptional pester power of a 6-year old?) joined in, adapting it after the fashion beloved of 6-year-olds everywhere, viz.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turd-tlesI stopped him there. Yet, somehow, he had managed to encapsulate the crucial je ne sais quoi of this movie: it's defining, unmistakeable and inherent crapness. Are you surprised? Of course it has the subtlety of a ton and a half of blancmange dropped from a 50-storey building hitting the pavement. Naturally Liebesman has the skills with comedy of a depressed funeral mute. Bien sûr the plot is nonsensical and full of holes, the pacing all to whack (the first 40 minutes drag terribly) and the fight scenes nothing but clobber-clobber-clobber. Plot: New York is being terrorised by a criminal gang called, if I remember correctly, 'Foot Locker'. Mysterious vigilantes are fighting back, and the film seriously wants us to spend the first three-quarters-of-an-hour curious about the identity of this mysterious crew despite the fact that their NAME IS THE TITLE OF THE SODDING MOVIE. Megan Fox plays a junior TV reporter, shunned by her News Channel because she believes the vigilantes are 6'6" mutant versions of the turtles she released years before from her father's lab. The smiling businessman who promises to help her solve the mystery is, of course, actually an evil businessman in the pay of Shredder. His plan is to pump out, from the roof of his central New York corporate skyscraper, vast amounts of a hideous poison gas that kills instantly by blistering the skin, then to wait thirty days (?), then release the antidote mutagen derived from the Turtles' blood ( ...??), thereby obtaining (his own words) 'a blank cheque from the US government' and the undisputed right to rule NY as his own private fiefdom. Eh? It's a stupid plan. It's the kind of plan that says: 'yeah, our scriptwriters really couldn't be bothered to think up anything better. Yeah, what ya gonna do?' The evil businessman's country estate is situated in those high snow-capped mountains that overlook New York City, just above the half-mile-high cliff that borders Manhattan ... yes, yes, you know the place. Presumably those alpine heights are visible from pretty much anywhere in the city. Anyway the Turtles save the day. Unsurprisingly.
Teenage Poo-tant Ninja Turd-tles
Wee-nage Poo-tant Ninja Turd-tles
Heroes in a Half Sh-
The only surprising thing here was how unsurprising the whole experience was. Only two things struck me as not what I had been expecting. One was just how repellent the CGI Turtles and their Ratmaster 'Splinter' are in close-up. Especially Splinter. Genuinely and gut-churningly yeuch! from start to finish. The other is the way the film factors in its non-kid audience. Other cinematic studios specialising in films aimed predominantly at kids (Pixar, say) take the time to write-in jokes and to stage moments for the adults they know will be chaperoning the kids to the movies. This film can't be bothered with any of that nonsense. Instead the movie is built around a repeat visual motif of Megan Fox's bottom, clad in tight-fitting denim (and at the end of the movie, in tight-fitting leather). No matter what else the film was supposed to be doing, the director has worked with the cinematographer to find a way to include Fox's bottom in shot, usually in close up. If there's an Oscar for crassness, this gesture alone makes the movie a top-grade contender.
Did I enjoy this movie? NO!-abunga, dudes.
Saturday, 25 October 2014
Laline Paull, The Bees (2014)
The elevator pitch here is 'Watership Down with bees'. I'm going to pause for a moment, to let you ponder that. There's a dash of Hunger Games in there too, as 'Flora 717' (born into a mute caste of Untouchable worker bees, but mysteriously gifted with bee-speech and saved for their own reasons by the higher up bees from the bee-extermination usually meted out to 'deformed' bees) struggles with the totalitarian structure of the hive. But, still. Basically: Watership Down with bees.
I'm old enough to remember watching the peerless David Nobbs/BBC comedy The Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin (the original, I mean; not the rubbish remake). In the third series of that show, broadcast 1978-79, Perrin opens a sort of commune for all his friends so they can all get in touch with their authentic tuned-in, dropped-out selves. C.J., his erstwhile boss, stimulated by the new environment, lets loose his creative energies. He writes Watership Down with ants.
C.J.: But I wonder if you all would like to hear an extract from my novel on—ants!I couldn't shake the memory of that sketch as I read The Bees. As I read Watership Beehive. As I read Plague Bees. As I read Lord of the Bees. As I read Bees of the Flies. As I read Bees-y Rider. As I read No Sex Please, We're Bees. It's a fine line between Creatively Estranging and Just Silly; a fine and important line. More important for writers of the fantastic than for other kinds of writer, I feel.
Elizabeth Perrin: Novel!
Reginald Perrin: Ants!
C.J.: I know what you're going to say...
Perrin's Staff Members: [all speaking together] You didn't get where you are today by writing a novel about ants!
C.J.: Exactly, but it's never too late for a leopard to change horses in mid-stream.
Reginald Perrin: What is your novel called, C.J.?
C.J.: I haven't decided between Watership Anthill, Plague Ants, Lord of the Ants, Ants of the Flies, Charley's Ant or No Sex Please, We're Ants.
Reginald Perrin: Yes, I can see the difficulty, C.J. Tricky choice, tricky choice! It would be too much bother for you to go and get the book.
C.J.: [Pulls manuscript from his pocket] I just happen to have an extract here with me.
Reginald Perrin: Oh, dear.
C.J.: [reading] "The owl led Thrugwash Blunt through the forest and then suddenly without any warning—"
Friday, 24 October 2014
Tania Unsworth, The One Safe Place (2014)
A readable, short-ish YA thriller, this. The first third conjures a well-handled mood of dourness out of its future-set climate-changed future desolation. The opening chapter, in which young Devin struggles to bury his dead grandfather at the remote farmstead the two share, is particularly good. Thereafter, and since a kid can't run a whole farm on his own, Devlin makes his way to the city to start a new life as a street kid, an unforgiving environment of gangs, corrupt cops and the occasional averted face of disdainful rich people hurrying somewhere better. Good. Then the second third shifts mood to a tenser, more insidiously nightmarish set of thrills. Devlin accepts an invitation to a charitable home for orphans, where he is promised food and toys; but it turns out to be a prison in the countryside, where he and the other kids are watched in proper creepy fashion by a bunch of decrepit elderly millionaires. Escape is impossible; and although children are promised that eventually they will all be adopted by happy-ending rich families, we clock early on that this is a lie. Kids starts full of vigour, but after they have been called to the mysterious tower at the heart of the complex a number of times they go weird, or mad. Devlin's synaesthesia is revealed as having a telepathic component which is why the sinister Administrator wanted him in the first place ('I need you to be healthy Devlin,' she tells him. 'I'm saving you for something special.')
The final third loses much of this tension and creepiness, though. Once the true purpose of the place is revealed the novel settles into a more predictable kids-gang-up-against-oppressive-adults, Escape-from-Stalag-YA-Dystopia vibe. I finished the novel with a slightly anticlimactic sense of things, of a great set-up frittered, rather, away. This is a pity, since the first two thirds of this novel touch effectively on something genuinely unnerving. As the cover copy, up there, says: you think you can hide inside your head? Think again.
Tuesday, 21 October 2014
Robert Jackson Bennett, City of Stairs (2014)
This enjoyable and absorbing novel is set in a Fantasy-ized sort-of-Russia, chief city Bulikov: a land whose spiritual reality has been ripped from it during a war with their former colony, godless Saypur (a Fantasy-ized sort-of version of the materialist West). And if I finished it wondering whether its very strengths don't go to prove that Worldbuilding Alone, no matter how cool and intricate, cannot carry a novel the whole distance ...? Well; that's probably just me. In case saying so makes my praise looks like the faint-and-therefore-damning variety, I'll reiterate it, unfaintly: the worldbuilding here is exceptionally cool.
In olden Bulikov, the gods were real, and divine magic sustained the social and material infrastructure of life. Once Saypur found a way to kill off the six divinities, not only did things like medical care and the sewage system stop working, reality itself fractured. Mass death, famine, invasion: fast-forward some decades to the start of the novel and the new Saypur ruling class have declared it illegal even to mention that there were once gods. Bulikov is now a strangely dislocated cityscape, filled (vide the book's title) with stairs that go nowhere, disjunctured walls, massy blocks of unconnected architecture, only partially re-fitted to supply the exigencies of city life for the surviving population. The land is poor and oppressed and the people are chafing under the imperial yoke. The opening chapter is set in a courtroom, where a Bulikov trader is being prosecuted for displaying a symbol that might be interpreted as the sigil of one of the unmentionable, vanished gods. But proceedings are interrupted when (duh! duh! DUHRR!) a famous Saypur scholar of all things Bulikovian, one Efram Pangyui, is discovered murdered.
An investigator is dispatched by the Saypur authorities to get to the bottom of the crime: a woman called Shara (in a slightly strained, even melodramatic touch it turns out that she is the great-granddaughter of Kaj, the Saypur warrior who somehow managed to develop the wonder-weapon that effected the deicide). Shara has a bodyguard, Sigrud: a barbarian of few words (rather Groot-like in some scenes; though in others somewhat more talkative) who seemed to me a little too self-consciously pitched at us as a 'future fan favourite!' I assume Bennett chose 'Bulikov' as a name for his city to honour this individual; that's pretty bold, if so. Certainly the novel never quite rises either to Master or even Margarita levels of powerfully strange. I also assumed, when reading, that Bennett was inspired by those etchings by ... oh, what's his name. Bear with me: I'm going to put you on hold for a moment when I go check this out.
[Tinny music]It does make me wonder, too: in a good sense. It is a wondrous novel. I've found the pictures I had in mind: Piranesi's Carceri, of course:
There's a writer who's sure all that glitters is gold
And he's writing a city of stai-airs.
When he gets there he knows, if the bookstores are closed
Go online, he can get what he came for.
Oo-oo-ooh, oo-oo-ooh, and he's writing a ci-i-ty of stairs.
[Jangle-jangle-guitar-strummy]
Ooh, it makes me wonder,
Ooh, it makes me wonder.
That's what kept flashing onto my mind's eye, at any rate, as I read. That, and a grittier, more Russian version of this:
One reason the worldbuilding works so well is that it gets not only the material details and consistency right; it gets the atmosphere right too. The story takes a little while to pick up momentum, but once it does it rolls very nicely along. Good book.
There are some problems, though, too. At the beginning City of Stairs perhaps reads too derivatively like a Fantasy version of Gorky Park: Shara investigates, overcomes inertia and opposition, pushes on despite high-up warnings, survives assassination attempts and so on. She runs into (another slightly strained co-incidence) to her old college boyfriend, now a wealthy Continental trader with factories producing a rare and valuable commodity: stainless steel. There's a deal of procedural stuff. Then after 100 pages or so of that the tone and pace shift a little jarringly: not all the gods are dead; revolution is in the air; magical artefacts are being stored in secret Raiders-of-the-Lost-Ark-last-scene warehouses that nobody knows about except that actually everybody seems to know about them.
Shara keeps 'calling' her aunt, who coincidentally is the head of Saypur Intelligence Services, with a magic viewer that's supposed only to be used for dire emergencies. There are attempts at metaphysical proundity that don't quite work; although at the same time the pace picks up from the rather sluggish opening. Bennett only partly squares the circle of bringing his readers up to speed with the complicated backstory and worldbuilding; which is to say, he can't quite resist the infodumpy aside, the as-you-know-Bob (or as-you-know-Boris) dialogue. There are a few too many moments when Shara stops to recapitulate what has happened so far and why it is important; or draws up lists -- seriously, itemised and numbered lists -- of her options for proceeding. It is sometimes wondrous; and sometimes a little jingle-jangly-strummy as it moves from set-piece to set-piece.
I recommend it, though: I enjoyed it plenty. Although I can't quite work out whether the symbolic translation from West/Former USSR into Saypur/Bulikov is muddled in an imaginatively debilitating way, or eloquently complex and tangled. The novel elides, I fear rather inchoately, our sense of 'Russia' as both more spiritual/mystic/religious than the West, and at the same time less so: godless Communism; dialectical materialism; Stalin's famines and gulags. The loss of the gods of this realm channel the 21st-century sense of all those towering Soviet Heroes, whose statues were literally pulled down, leaving a country dislocated, prey to mafia (Bennett calls them 'warlords'), confused about its past. But at the same time, it is Communism itself that dislocated the ancient, god-haunted land of Russia. The West, likewise, occupies a blurry double-state. We're told that Saypur was forced to develop materially and scientifically because it didn't have gods: that on the Continent the gods simply magicked the cities' sewage away, but on Saypur they had to dig proper sewers. So, when the gods disappeared Saypur was well-placed to survive, and the Continent struggled. But the notion that Asia somehow 'had it easy' whilst Europe and the USA put in the hard graft inventing civilisation is a pretty rum one; as is the symbolic identification of the West with atheistical materialism (no Jesusland?) and Asia with soft-eyed reality-bending religious submission. We might call that, oh I don't know, pick a word, 'orientalism'. Are we take 'materialism' here as a cipher for consumerism, against which the USSR held out with the support of their nomenklatura, until the wall fell and their lives went to shit? Seems like an odd position, considering (say) that modern Russia has exactly the same Gini coefficient as the modern US. But, see, this is precisely the problem. I should stop trying to think through the implications Bennett's worldbuilding, and just enjoy it for itself. So I do that. Even if it means the novel thereby drifts into a pleasant-passtime space, rather than a something-interesting-to-say-about-the-world space.
Friday, 17 October 2014
Lavie Tidhar, A Man Lies Dreaming (2014)
I reviewed this depraved novel for The Guardian. Snip:
Perhaps turning so hallowed a site of human suffering into pulp fiction will scare admirers off. It is an approach more common in movies: treating weighty subjects such as nazism and slavery through the medium of schlock is, after all, exactly what Quentin Tarantino does. Like Tarantino, Tidhar may find that some people don't take him seriously. But the joke's on them. Seriousness is the least of it: A Man Lies Dreaming is a twisted masterpiece.
Wednesday, 15 October 2014
Jeff Vandermeer, Southern Reach (2014)
I wrote quite a long account of Vandermeer's Southern Reach Trilogy for Strange Horizons. Over on Twitter a couple of people have responded to the review by quite rightly deprecating my only-male list of 'strange pastoral' texts: that was feeble of me, no question. Johanna Sinisalo's Birdbrain and Nina Allen's The Race were mentioned. Sadly I have not (yet) read either. Clearly I need to do more work before any conclusions about the masculinist bias of strange pastoral itself can be mooted.
Sunday, 12 October 2014
Rene Cloke's Alice
Gorgeous Irene ('Rene') Cloke illustrations in this 1930s edition of "Alice in Wonderland", including a splendidly alien-like Caterpillar.
I also like this rather diabolical endpiece:
I also like this rather diabolical endpiece:
Saturday, 11 October 2014
Michel Faber, The Book of Strange New Things (2014)
Faber is a novelist I esteem a great deal; but this novel left me pulling my 'lost dog pondering a sign-post' face. It's not badly written, or wholly uninteresting; but by the same token I can't honestly say it really works or that I liked it, or that it struck me as ultimately worthwhile. I'd be tempted to peg it as falling down in the ways familiar from previous 'literary' novelists deciding to have a go at genre sf; except Faber's debut Under the Skin was a proper SF novel, and a very good one. So what goes wrong here?
I'll qualify myself straight away and say that some elements here go very right. The core of the novel is a portrait of a happy marriage, Peter Leigh and his wife Bea, put under the strain of enforced separation, and that's very precisely and movingly worked. I also liked very much the way Faber treats the Christian faith of his Peter and Bea: it's central to their senses of self, and it's handled in the novel with great scads of earnest Christian evangeloid and soul-searchy discourse, as they both try to comprehend and do what they take to be God's will. Like the marvellous BBC series Rev., Strange and New Things manages to give a sense of Peter's life as a vicar in England as one defined by external stresses and practicalities without losing sight of the inward, sustaining faith. It's rare to see that in contemporary fiction. (Of course, the fact that strangeness and newness have always struck me as the crucial Christian salients, howsoever obscured by centuries of tradition and the affection people have for tradition, doubtless helped Faber's representation of Christianity strike home for me where that was concerned). One of the novel's best moments, I thought, is when Peter recalls the day he proposed to Beatrice, 10.30 on a morning of sweltering heat, as the two of them were standing at a cash machine in the high street prior to doing a supermarket shop.
Maybe he should have gone down on one knee, because her "Yes, let's" had sounded hesitant and unromantic, as though she considered the proposal nothing more than a pragmatic solution to the inconvenience of high rents. [203]Everything in the day goes wrong: their bank card is swallowed by the machine; when they go to the branch to get a new one the teller is rude and insulting and Bea storms out in a rage; outside they discover a vandal had scratched a swastika into the paintwork of the car; Bea's phone loses battery; the first garage they visit is shut, the second quotes a huge sum for the work to repair the scratched paintwork; then they discover the car exhaust is shot and will need replacing, none of which can they afford. When they eventually get home Peter realises the lamb chops they had bought had spoiled in the heat. He is about to throw them out in fury, but changes his mind. He finds Bea on the balcony of their flat, gazing at the brick wall opposite.
Her cheeks were wet.It's a moment more-or-less nicked from Flaubert's L'Éducation sentimentale of course, but never mind that. It works very well.
'I'm sorry,' he said.
She fumbled for his hand, and their fingers interlocked.
'I'm crying because I'm happy,' she explained, as the sun allowed itself to be veiled in clouds. 'This is the happiest day of my life.' [204]
So, alright, but here's the problem: all this stuff is prologue and backstory only. The main focus of The Book of Strange New Things, and the reason why Peter is separated so painfully from Bea, is that he has accepted a job with a commercial corporation called USIC to work as a Christian missionary on a distant planet, Oasis. Most of the novel is set here, a hot, rather barren world with 72-hour-long night, constant rain and a spongy surface that soaks all the water up. How the water thereafter convects back into the sky to fall as rain again is not explained. Indeed, throughout these sections, the SF fan's imagination taps Faber's writing to find it not ringing true. Peter agrees to go despite knowing absolutely next-to-nothing about the distant world (Earth as a whole seems improbably uninterested in this habitable, populated planet with its English-speaking aliens), and even less about the organisation that is taking him on. He doesn't even know what 'USIC' stands for. On the space flight to his destination, and upon arrival, other characters drip-feed him (and us) information, but the notion that he'd be parcelled off on this epochal journey without training or briefing simply boggles the mind. There is some hand-wavy intimation that the hyperspace jump has scrambled his memories, so that he's forgotten stuff he was briefed on, but it's not very convincing. When Peter arrives on the planet he's left to his own devices by the other members of the colony; oddly offhand behaviour by his otherwise cost-conscious new employers, given that the expense of transportation means every coke he drinks costs hundreds of dollars and every email he sends his wife (and with nothing else to do he sends a lot) cost them $5000 a pop.
Eventually Peter makes his way to a village of aboriginals -- humanoid in shape and wearing hooded abayas, the main difference to us being that their faces look like 'two foetuses curled up'. Whatever that looks like. Peter discovers, which fact nobody had bothered to tell him, that there was a previous missionary called Kurtzberg who has subsequently disappeared; and that the otherwise opaquely baffling aliens are desperately enthusiastic to receive more Biblical teaching, readings from what they call the 'Book of Strange New Things'. So Peter sets to; and his learning the world is interspersed with epistles between himself and his wife in which she details an increasingly desperate climate collapse on the home planet, and slowly grows apart from him.
The further I read, the more I began to wonder if the weird conceptual ellipses and apparent clumsinesses were going to be explained by some clever final reveal. But, no. They're not. The rather infuriatingly leisurely telling finally works its way to an end, whereupon the reader pauses to reflect how debilitatingly second hand the whole SF element is. This is Blish's A Case of Conscience, without the focus or imaginative steel; and without Blish's deep engagement with the problematic of the human, rather than alien, incarnation of Christ in the gospels. It's Mary Doria Russell's The Sparrow (a much inferior book to Blish's) with only the blandly nice aliens and not the rapist feline overlords. The result is The Book Of Depressingly Familiar and Old-Fashioned Things.
Nor, despite some lovely passages here and there, is it an especially well put-together novel. Faber's novel starts slowly, and then drifts through hundreds of pages detailing Oasan agricultural routines and Oasan funerary practises and the Oasan habits of shitting in the streets without breaking stride. It picks up some emotional heft again towards the end, though the actual ending itself, avoiding spoilers, is very anti-climactic. When he wants to represent the Oasans speaking their own language (and the difficulty they have speaking English and pronouncing our 's' and 'd'), Faber goes fontbonkers:
Over on Twitter, Samir H. (@ap0cryphal) tells me this is indeed Arabic, though in garbled form ('a native Arab speaker would be able to tell what's actually in that sentence, reading right-to-left' he tweeted me; adding 'the "s" character is called "meem", phonetically it's an "m" sound; "t" character is called "lam," phonetically it's an "l" sound'). I stop short of accusing Faber, with his bernouse-wearing, crumple-faced, shitting-in-the-street, yearning-to-hear-the-true-Gospel, white-protagonist-can't-tell-them-apart, village-dwelling, Arabic speaking aliens, of trading in racist stereotypes. But I'm standing right on the line, there. Who knows? Maybe he uses Arabic font because it's available on the MS Word font menu, and so was ready-to-hand. I don't know, though. (Near the end of the book, he refers to one of the alien's hoods as a 'hijab', so maybe it's all deliberate).
The real problem, it dawns on you as you read, is that Faber just isn't that interested in his alien Others. His story is about the strain placed upon a loving marriage by distance and other difficulties. That in turn makes the alien worldbuilding, the planetary colonisation plans, the aliens themselves pasteboard, set-dressing. A shame, all in all.
On the upside: nice cover design!
Wednesday, 8 October 2014
Ian Sales, Then Will The Great Ocean Wash Deep Above (Apollo Quartet Book 3) (2014)
Sales is a friend of mine, or as close as any male from the south of England can be friends with a male from the north of that country (never a proximity to be measured in millimetres, that. It can't be helped. It's stipulated in Magna Carta). What this means is that you must take any praise I offer here with a pinch of salt. Then again, you don't need to take my word for it. The first volume of his Apollo Quartet (2012's Adrift on a Sea of Rains) deservedly won the BSFA award, and was shortlisted for the Sidewise to boot. If I liked the second volume, The Eye With Which The Universe Beholds Itself (2012), a smidgen less, it wasn't because it was any less well written, but rather because the central conceit seemed to me to have a flaw in it. In another writer, flaws matter less; but with Sales you notice even slightest imperfections, because his literary sensibility is so fine tuned. He writes with control and precision, taking the rocket science of his alt-historical Apollo era seriously, getting all the technical details right and not shying away from the equations. At the same time he writes with conscious and only sometimes self-conscious literary skill. It's a combo that has made for a fascinating and compelling series of novellas.
Sales isn't the only writer to meld hard-sf accuracy with a properly literary sensibility, of course. Amongst contemporary writers Paul McAuley, for instance, comes to mind. But McAuley's 'literariness' has much to do with a fine style and vividness of observation out of William Golding. Sales is a different sort of author: stylistically quite purged and plain, but structurally quite ambitious. Not for nothing is he writing a 'quartet': Apollo is Lawrence Durrell without the wild thickets of purple over-prosing. And of the three Apollo Quartet books out so far, Then Will The Great Ocean Wash Deep Above seems to me easily the best. It is divided between 'up' and 'down' chapters (with a leavening of 'strangeness' and 'charm'). In the up sections, an extended Korean war has resulted in Mercury astronauts being recruited from the ranks of female pilots. In the down we're in a different timeline: a US Navy bathyscaphe descends 20,000 feet into the Atlantic Puerto Rico Trench to recover a film packet dropped from a spy satellite. The two stories are well balanced, the absorbing pseudo-facticity of the former playing well off the genuine tension and excitement of the latter; and as in the earlier books (and as with the earlier books, on a formal level) the implications of juxtaposition are only partly spelled out. The result is a very memorable and effective piece of writing indeed. I am very much looking forward to seeing how Sales finishes the quartet off, not least because it will then become more apparent how the whole quaternion structure fits together. Excellence is here.
Eric Brown, Jani and the Greater Game (2014)
Steampunky alt-historical India: British Raj, 1920s vintage. A mysterious energy source called 'Annapurnite' has enabled Britain to maintain a boosted global empire. Jani Chatterjee, precocious teenager and the daughter of an Indian government minister, is returning home from Cambridge University via airship when the Russians attack. She is saved from Russian violation and murder by a weird creature: 'long and thin, its skin deathly white ... its features were almost human' (alien? Frankenstein's monster? Peter Crouch?) From there-on it's a series of diverting adventures in Brown's alt-Raj: dastardly plots are afoot; life-size mechanical elephants are there for the riding; Annapurnite is not all it seems. It's enjoyable stuff, if perhaps a little underinflated, narratively speaking. Sometimes it reads like a jolly novella expanded to novel length; and few of the twists surprised me. Still, Jani is an appealing protagonist, and the pastiche Edwardian-y ripping yarn style is fun. But why take my 21st-century word for it? Why not go to the source: actual journals and newspapers from the alt-1920s. How do they describe the book? General Sir Rochford Faughles said
And? And whom? No matter. Turn instead to the celebrated sapient dog and critic, Sir Collie Wilkins, who identified the key elements of the story as comprising:
All in all: tasty.
The following image has nothing to do with Eric Brown, and is in no way intended as a caricature of him.
Sunday, 5 October 2014
Joe Abercrombie, Half A King (2014)
Half a review. Prince Yarrrvi, descended perchance from pirates, is set the task of regaining his Aberkingdom by an Abercruel fate. Though born an Abercripple (and thus considered the titular 'half' mentioned on the book's abercover) Yarrrvi must use his Abercleverness and his one Abercapable hand to regain the Abercrown he never Abercraved in the first place, overcoming abadversity, hardship, double-abercrossing and the general Abercrappiness of the Abercosmos's attitudes to mortals. Trust no-one; for even those Aberclosest to you can betray you into slabery, sorry, slavery. In a nutshell, this is a lean, chilled, typically well-abercrafted tale. The world Joe has Abercreated is Abercrisply evoked; the Abercharacters work well; the violence, though Abercranked down a notch from First Law (this being YA), is Abercrimson enough for most palates. Most of all it's immensely, rather disgracefully readable: gripping and twisty. An Abercracking yarn. If I had one Abercriticism to make, it would be that
Saturday, 4 October 2014
Michael R. Underwood, Attack the Geek: a Ree Reyes Side-quest (2014)
I disliked this book. I also misliked it, unliked it, de-liked it and anti-liked it. Maybe if I'd read the previous 'Ree Reyes' novels that latter reaction wouldn't have been so anti. But then again, do we really need the previous instalments when Underwood gives us the kind of complete summation of character of which Proust himself, were he alive, would surely be envious? 'Ree Reyes (Strength 10, Dexterity 14, Stamina 12, Will 18, IQ 16, Charisma 15—Geek 7/Barista 3/Screenwriter 3/Gamer Girl 2/Geekomancer 2)' [13]. Rees and her pals are able to access magic skills, plus Harry Potter wands and lightsabres and so on, by invoking various genre pop-culture references; and these they use to fight goblins, gnomes, minotaurs and other monsters through sewers and geek boutiques ('bout-giques'?) called things like 'Grognard's Grog and Games'. It's a sort of D&D game come to life, and the longer it went on the more tiresome and charmless I found it. It wants to be Buffy; but Buffy had dialogue to die for. This book has (to pick some examples at random) '"Thou shalt not fuck with one of thy best friend's relationships" she told herself' [19]; "You know what? Fuck you, you worthless piece of shit." [52]; '"Holy Shit!" Rees said.' [117]; '"The fuck?" Rees asked' [128]; "Motherfucking fireballs" [174]. Oscar Fucking Wilde it fucking ain't. The plot is a hectic mishmash of bewildering interactions, fighting, swearing and running through shit. But the real problem is the author's inability to bridge the 'you had to be there' divide. The point of this book is to capture some of the joy (a genuine and wondrous joy) we feel when we hang out without friends and do fun things, like playing games. You try to pass the joy along, saying 'we had a blast man! Eastwood said this really hilarious thing!' But when you repeat the hilarious thing, you find your interlocutors are only smiling politely, and not dissolving in helpless laughter the way you did. Now, a writer worth her/his salt can recreate the ambience and make the hilarity come alive again. Underwood can't do this.
But that's fine. Your dice-age may vary, and I (Pomposity 10, Fondness-for-Nabokov 9, Englishness 879) am surely not the target audience here. But, at the risk of pushing my pomposity score even higher, I found myself wondering whether this short novel figures not as a celebration of geek culture and in-crowd together, but instead as an indictment of it. When your friends swear, especially swear inventively, it is funny, because they're your friends, and you know they don't actually mean to harm you. But when somebody you don't know swears at you it is unpleasant and intimidating and scary. There are reasons why the idiom of courtesy is the right one for public interactions. But SF, in its faceless online conversations, very often loses sight of this. I'm guessing this is compounded of the fact that (a) if I swear aggressively in, say, a tweet, you may decide to take this as a sign that (though we've never met) you and I are friends, and grant me leeway. So perhaps the hyperprofane idiom is assumed by some to be a kind of bonding ritual. There may also (b) be a failure of empathy, or more complexly a failure to understand that the Other who has never met you has no grounds to empathise with you, behind this: the fabled asperger's-spectrum personality limitations of the geek. So if I tweet that (to pick an example out of the air) Paolo Bacigalupi should have acid thrown in his face for his portrayal of Thai characters, it may be that you assume everyone will know you aren't serious. Hey! Nobody who knows me would think I would actually throw acid in anyone's face! The failing here, of course, is that other people, including the textually assaulted Bacigalupi himself, don't know you, and have no reason to give you the benefit of any doubt. Verbal assault is still assault. Then again, (c) I wonder if the main problem is a broader inability of tonal nuance. If Geek A has a disagreement with another person over some matter, and addresses him/her with 'Fuck you. You can fucking bleed-out in a back alley while I sit watching you, sipping my caffè macchiato'. Perhaps Geek A thinks that the main effect of such expression is to convey just how vehemently s/he feels about the point at issue. But that's not the main effect. The main effect is to paint Geek A as callous and violent. The vehemence is in service of a deeply unattractive pointed discourtesy. There are better ways of disagreeing; and by better I mean 'more effective' for any metric of effective you prefer. And there are much, much better ways of writing insults into books. Let it be written in ten-foot-high letters in the public agora of genre, that nobody miss it: VEHEMENCE AND VIOLENCE ARE NOT THE SAME THING.
Marcus Sedgwick, The Ghosts of Heaven (2014)
[Note. There are four quarters to this review; they can be read in any order and the review will work. The four quarters assembled here are in just one of twenty-four possible combinations; this order makes one kind of snark, but the reader should feel free to choose a different opinion of the book, if desired.]
QUARTER ONE.
Not 'first quarter', but, instead, 'quarter one', like that.
Ever-so-slightly unidiomatic.
No matter. For the whole section is
written
in a diffuse kind of
verse. A stone age girl
sees a spiral carved in the rock, in a cave.
Under ground, under-
powered. Some great novels have
been able to pull-off the 'start with a long poem'
malarkey.
Not this. The problem,
the problem is the verse
just isn't
very good.
QUARTER TWO. The Witchfinder General rode into the 17th-century English village his heart full of malice. Devilry was everywhere! Oh, nobody calls him the Witchfinder General. Oh, nobody marks his physical resemblance to Vincent Price. They think he's just the new vicar. But he sees the simple villagers dancing their spiral dance in the graveyard! He smells out their unreformed pagan rituals!
Ah but the villagers have the social cohension of a Simpsons instamob, and are easily persuaded to turn. Drown the witch! Drown pretty young redheaded Anna Tunstall, whose mother has just died! And (when her brother pulls her out of the pond and saves her life) put her on trial!
'If you please sir,' said the virtuous, sobbing young Anna. 'It's all a misunderstanding! This is no Vincent Price-era schlocky Hammer melodrama! No, no, sir, it is a focussed tragedy after the manner of Arthur Millers Crucible!'
'Silence wench!' screamed Father Escrove, spittle flying from his withered lips. The whole courthouse moaned. 'Nuance and subtlety are the Devil's cruet set! We aim for a broader emotional response, here! So I order: strip this toothsome young redhead naked, here in the very courthouse, for all to see how attractive, er, I mean, how witchy-wicked she is!'
QUARTER THREE. It's the 1920s. The spacious insane asylum in upstate New York is build around a large spiral staircase. Spirals you see. You're starting to see how this works? You're grokking the Cloud-Atlasishness? Anna saw the same rock-carved spiral under the water, as they were trying to drown her, as the cavegirl saw, and there's bound to be a plethora of spirals in this section too. Shells, waves, but most of all stairs. There's a mad poet inmate who watches the sea obsessively (his famous collection of poetry is called On Drowning), and one of the asylum doctors mourning his drowned wife Caroline. Dexter is terrified of the staircase; so the bullying Asylum Director forces him to look at him at it ('Dexter's eyes were wide with terror as he looked to the very top of the building where that fine spiral staircase ascends into the cupola, and he screamed a long and empty scream, a howl from the bottom of his mind, that spoke of the unnameable horror at the world before him' [25]. Wait, how can the scream be both empty and speaking?) Of course the Asylum director is a cackling villain, and his hired goons are violent rapists. Of course our narrator is a sensitive, troubled soul.
QUARTER FOUR. Stardate 2001 plus howevermany years. Starman Keir Bowman (seriously; that's the dude's name) is on route for 'New Earth' in the constellation of Lyca. He is woken every ten years to perform 12 hours of shipboard duties. A couple thousand passengers in deep sleep, ready to be woken at the far end of the journey, and he the caretaker-astronaut. But people are dying in their Longsleep pods. What about all the stuff to do with spirals? 'Spiral rotation of galaxies ... the hurricane eye of Jupiter ... the motion of the Earth ... the DNA inside him' [371] ME: Affirmative, Book. I read you. BOOK: Open the pod bay deeper cosmic significances, Adam. ME: I'm sorry, Book. I'm afraid I can't do that. BOOK: What's the problem? ME: I think you know what the problem is just as well as I do.
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